Transparent Faith Pt I

Though the fig tree should not blossom, nor fruit be on the vines, the produce of the olive fail and the fields yield no food, the flock be cut off from the fold and there be no herd in the stalls,

yet I will rejoice in the LORD; I will take joy in the God of my salvation.

GOD, the Lord, is my strength; he makes my feet like the deer’s; he makes me tread on my high places. Habakkuk 3:17-19

For this trip I am blogging about to have been one of the BEST times and greatest moves of GOD in my life, it sure was hard to write! I mean to tell you, I have been battling procrastination since my return among other add on struggles!! BUT GOD, has ordained everything in order so I know now is the time! 

Through a series of almost tragic and then tragic events, GOD chose the end of September and beginning of October (my birth month) to train my strength, raise up in me new faith! And that He has done well! 

My family had one go into the hospital and another die within a week. I knew that we were to go to be with them as they are down south but only had coins in my pocket. GOD used that week to not only strengthen my faith, but draw some emotions out of me that He could not use and show me where I would be when I left where I am now. It was also to pour love onto my family who I'm not sure some of them know the love of Christ personally. And just to be there for my aunt who had a husband seem to go downhill fast and her last living brother die. I know GOD sent us there because it was on His tab! He provided in crazy ways and I now believe that was to prepare my heart for the miracles and wonders I would see Him do for my family and my finances. He has done just that since!

Here is what I learned that week. I learned that GOD does indeed give you peace as well as determination about something He sets in your heart to do. We had no idea how we would pay for or get to Florida but I knew we had to go. So I constantly prayed and spoke out of my mouth that we were going. He provided $600 and that got us there and back but He also provided and extra $190 which gave cushion and allowed us to eat something other than sandwiches on our way back! I walked away knowing that NOTHING is impossible for my GOD!

Another thing I learned is that He does what He pleases. I don't know what happened with my uncle that died and why all of a sudden he was gone. But I know how hard we were praying for his sister's (my aunt) husband as he laid in the hospital with some type of brain bleed. And I do know that I knew that I knew that I knew that as we took of driving my moms car and got word that my aunt was now in the hospital that they would both be fine and they are, just celebrating another wedding anniversary!

As I laid down after returning from the trip, there were things I was certain of. I was certain that we were suppsed to be there, that I would be moving there when directed by GOD, that He hears our cries and petitions, that He delivers and gives provision, and that when I fall asleep at the wheel, He is the One who really drives!! I left with a newfound faith that has been tested ever since! 

I was shortly after released from my job because of performance (even though I had just learned two new programs), we were almost evicted and had a court hearing for it on CHRISTmas eve at the request of the landlord, and at one point felt hopelessness slipping in. But He has wowed me each day since that trip and I know there is more!! 

Where are you struggling today? What are you having a hard time believing for? Will He need to bring you to hardship to grow your faith and will your surrender all you know as logic to allow it?

LORD, You are the same still! I stay in awe of You and I pray that never changes. Continue to grow my faith in You. Thank You for my daily bread and for being my Portion! In Jesus name! Amen!

Transparent Reach

Transparent Reach

He said, "Come." So Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water and came to Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, "Lord, save me." Matthew 14:29, 30 ESV

Jesus was walking on water. Why was that do hard to believe for those who had seen Him perform other miracles? He sent them in ahead of them so why did they forget that He was coming once they were further out? Why do our minds work in the natural only? If we for see it or ourselves, we don't tend to believe it. Or is that just the way my mind works? Even Peter AFTER Jesus said "It is I. Do not fear," he still needed proof. It's as if he was saying, "You say it's you but I don't believe you unless I have proof." How many do that (raising hand). And then once Jesus graciously told him to come out, instead of knowing that Jesus, the one who had told him to step out, the one who would never let anything happen to us, would never let him sink more than necessary. But we do that. We worry when we see or hear the winds and storms in our life.

What I notice, what God has showed me is that I cry out to those in the boat because I can SEE the boat and people in it. Because Peter could see Jesus, he called out to Him even though he only had to focus on Him to stay above water. Did you catch that? If only we would focus on Christ, we will stay above water. But of course, we don't and so because of His grace, He knows that and extends His hand to us. But what I realized today is that not only do I cry out I those in the boat but I do it knowing full well that Jesus is right there for me, knowing full well He has me. I also realized that when I start to sink, He's closer than I usually think.

How about you? Do you aim for the boat faster than you do for Jesus when you cry out in a storm? Do you reach for the phone and call or text someone because it seems like they are closer than Jesus is? Do you only seem to wait until you start sinking to call in Him? Or perhaps you still call in those that are visible to the fleshy eye. This week I challenge you to try Him and see if indeed He is closer.

The verse that was just given to me as I wrote that part was "A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother," Proverbs 18:24. I have a brother and when we were young we had no choice but to be close. Our parents didn't do sibling rivalry like parents nowadays. But as we got older, we grew in different ways. We had life happen. We still love each other just the same but we don't see each other nearly as much as I desire. But oh when we do.... it's like no time had passed. I find myself looking at Jesus in that way. When I am in troubled waters, when I step out of the boat like He commanded and then start to sink, He doesn't feel close so I reach out to people in prayer and for relief. But this verse reminds me that He is a friend that sticks CLOSER than a brother. He is there when we need Him, when we have no idea that we need Him and even when we don't think we need Him. He is closer than a brother, He is closer than any family member, He is CLOSER than we think.

Father, thank you for not only the sacrifice of Your Son's death but His life that You have for us. Jesus, thank You for the life You led to show us how to overcome our storms and that we can reach out to you, without condemnation, when we struggle to stay on the troubled waters of life. You truly are closer than anyone else, I pray that we would remember that and look to you. In Jesus name. Amen.